CARRY ME CARAVAN, TAKE ME AWAY, TAKE ME TO PORTUGAL
A bit of advance warning for you; your esteemed co-ordinator is off on holiday next weekend (w/c 28 September) for a week. I’ll be sunning myself in the Algarve, accompanied by my lovely lady, PTY boss Rachel, and Mega Buck’s managerial duo of Dave and Ceri Bevan. I’ll be around to pick up the teams on Saturday 28th, but I won’t be around to pick up calls the following Saturday (5th October) as we have very late flights back.
Can I therefore please ask you ALL, with the exception of our Amish lorry driver colleague, to please e-mail your teams to me on that Saturday, 5th October? This will be the weekend of the first round of the Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy, and I would imagine by that time our overworked answering machine might be a tad full. Thanks guys.
This also means that the next newsletter will be a bit late. I’ll publish it after my return, and it will cover both next weekend’s league fixtures and the PCMT 1st round games.
OCTOBER, KINGDOMS RISE AND KINGDOMS FALL
As mentioned above, the first weekend of October sees the first round of the Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy, the draw for which was made by Evan in between bouncing on his dad’s bad leg and playing on the Disney Playhouse website. As per last year, the top 8 teams in the league (before this weekend’s fixtures) were drawn randomly against the bottom 8 teams, and Rachel did a coin toss to decide home advantage. The draw therefore is as follows;
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum v Claymore Athletic FC
Prettier Than You v Short Straw Rovers
Real Muppets v Aardvark Abacus
San Dimas High School v Viola’s Pier
Trusted By Millions v Elland Road Big Boys
22 Legged Groove Machine v Kylie Bumcheeks
York’s Returning Glory v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
You Know Your Boston Rock FC v Mega Buck Bandits
It’s a pretty corking draw, with the 2 standout ties being the Toffee Derby between fast-starting Nil Satis and Claymore Athletic FC, and the showdown between last year’s top 2 teams Real Muppets and Aardvark, Ryan no doubt looking for revenge for the opening day defeat. The games will be played on the weekend of Saturday 5th October.
BEATLE BASED POP VERSUS NEW ROMANTIC
Well, not exactly, but a serious clash of musical styles heads the Fantasy League table after this weekend, with both leaders Kylie Bumcheeks and second placed Boston Rock FC continuing their good runs and forging a 2 point lead over the rest. Alan Shearer spearheaded a fine 3-1 win for the Bumcheeks over a good San Dimas side, and Boston Rock squeaked a 2-1 win over strugglers Viola’s Pier, Alain Goma getting a late late winner for the Sky Heroes.
Behind them, Nil Satis were held to a 1-1 draw by Prettier Than You and slip to 4th, PTY finally getting their first points on the board as a result. Aardvark Abacus go into 3rd after a 2-1 win over York’s, Milan Baros continuing his hot streak with another for Ady’s team.
Elsewhere, Short Straw slip down after a 2-0 defeat by Fred West; Elland Road move back up to 5th after a 1-0 win over the misfiring Muppets; and the other 2 games end in deadlock.
POTW was therefore a bit tricky; lots of draws around, and in the main, teams who won were pretty much expected to do so. So, I’m going out on a limb and, ducking accusations of favouritism (justified? You’re damn right!), I’m awarding POTW to a drawing team, namely bottom team Prettier Than You, for holding 3rd place team Nil Satis to a 1-1 draw, and getting off the big zero pointes in the process. Well done Rachel.
THE EARTH HAS MOVED AND I’VE BEEN TURNED AROUND
Following suitable consultation and agreement with my Executive Committee, I’m introducing a new process called the “Recat Cooling Down Period” for the remainder of this season. This will effectively work in the same way as the pool cooling down period, as follows;
- If any player currently in the pool is recategorised to a position that could increase his value to a Fantasy League team (i.e. a forward to midfield, or a midfielder to defence), then that player is subject to a recat “cooling down period”. In the same way that the pool “cooling down” period operates, I will publish the player’s details in the newsletter, and any interested managers have until 8 p.m. on the following Monday to submit a single sealed bid for that player to the co-ordinator. The player is then sold to the highest bidder, unless it’s a single bid situation, in which case the bidding manager buys the player for £500K.
This came about as a result of my Spurs defender Goran Bunjevcevic being recatted into midfield, but also at the same time Mauricio Taricco (currently in the pool) being recatted from midfield to defence. I wanted to dump Goran and buy Taricco, but of course that would be a flagrant abuse of my privileged position as your esteemed (and hopefully trusted) co-ordinator. However if I were to just publish the recat in the newsletter, then wait a couple of days before buying him, someone else might snatch him from under my nose, which would be disadvantaging myself.
So the above rule was concocted by myself and the Executive Committee, to satisfy both fair play, and also give Boston Rock’s boss a fair chance of buying the player.
So, as mentioned, Taricco is the test case. Any managers interested in buying him can submit a single bid until 8 p.m. on Monday 30 September 2002, after which time he goes into the pool proper and is readily available. Or rather not, as I may bid for him myself!
TRANSFER NEWS
No one but the Big Man noticed Arsenal’s new goalie’s bench appearance a couple of weekends ago. Also, Boston Rock win the race (yes, there was one), to sign Chelsea’s giant young defender Robert Huth…
Player From To Fee
Patrice Luzi (G) 22 Legged Groove Machine Pool £400,000
Rami Shaaban (G) Pool 22 Legged Groove Machine £500,000
Ivan Campo (D) Pool San Dimas High School £500,000
Danny Pugh (M) Pool Short Straw Rovers £500,000
Goran Bunjevcevic (M) YKY Boston Rock FC Pool £850,000
Steve Watson (D) YKY Boston Rock FC Pool £250,000
Robert Huth (D) Pool YKY Boston Rock FC £500,000
Pierre Wome (D) Pool YKY Boston Rock FC £500,000
Qu Bo (A) Nil Satis Nisi Optimum Released (never signed) £500,000
Tommy Mooney (A) Nil Satis Nisi Optimum Pool £250,000
Peter Clarke (D) Pool Nil Satis Nisi Optimum £500,000
Don’t forget that the players highlighted are subject to the pool “cooling off” period. Any managers interested in buying them can bid until 8 p.m. on Monday 30 September 2002, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available.
THE FF£100,000 QUESTION
This one is great.
Which recently retired Premiership striker now runs a herbal remedy farm in the Belize jungle?
One guess per person to me by close of play on Saturday 28 September 2002.
Wizzard frontman Roy Wood is a long-time fan of Birmingham City. It seemed his dad was a Villa fan so he became a Bluenose to be different. As if the humongous beard and zigzag eye-make up wasn’t enough to stand out from the crowd.
Correct guesses from Ady, Peej, Clive (surprise surprise) and Dean (who advised me that other Rock Celebrity Bluenoses include Nigel Clarke from Dodgy, Jeff Lynne from ELO & Dan Worton – would that be Dan Dan the fast drumming man by any chance? – from Neds Atomic Dustbin). The £100,000 goes to our stumpy Anteating colleague.
SHORTS
Whoops! Just in case you thought that Anthony Gardner was a jolly clever chap to be playing and scoring for both Elland Road Big Boys and San Dimas High School last weekend, the goalscoring Gardner for Peej was in fact Ricardo Gardner…Recats apace…aside from the previously mentioned Bunjevcevic and Taricco recats, both Igor Balis (22LGM) and Neil Clement (San Dimas) are now midfielders…
WSFFL RESULTS
Week 5, W/E 21 September 2002
Claymore Athletic FC 1-1 22 Legged Groove Machine
Henry (2) Melchiot 29,869
Elland Road Big Boys 1-0 Real Muppets
Niclas Jensen (3) 37,974
Kylie Bumcheeks 3-1 San Dimas High School
Shearer (2) Queudrue
Hyypia
Howey 67,611
Prettier Than You 1-1 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Bellamy (2) Kanu 25,714
Short Straw Rovers 0-2 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
(2) Silvestre
Van Nistelrooy 43,830
Trusted By Millions 0-0 Mega Buck Bandits
(4) 30,023
York’s Returning Glory 1-2 Aardvark Abacus
Young (1) Riise
Baros 35,550
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 2-1 Viola’s Pier
Rio Ferdinand (1) Flitcroft
Goma 52,181
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