THIS PARROT IS DECEASED!
Ladies and Gentlemen, may I introduce you to the latest WSFFL team – The Dead Parrots! In true MK Dons fashion, this is a rebadged version of the former Elland Road Big Boys, still under the stewardship of our esteemed Antipodean colleague, dean Watts. So why the name change, Dean?
“The ERBB success has been patchy over the past few seasons & with the failure of the sister company Leeds United, its seems the best option is to change names.
A new name has been up & running over the past 6 months & has had great success in various Fantasy Comps.”
Dean also provided me with a list of Aussie leagues in which the Dead Parrots have been successful for him. But are they ready to step up to the big league that is WSFFL? We shall see!
THAT’S ALL CHANGED AND NOW I’M STEPPING OUT
Three teams are still striding out at the top of the table with 100% records, but Claymore Athletic FC are banging goals in for fun. For the second week in a row they’ve knocked in 6, this time past their “bogey team” Prettier Than You, who with their 6-0 win, featuring a Leon Osman double, they’ve beaten for the first time ever in the league! So after 3 games, Clive’s champions top the table with a plus fifteen goal difference. Already. Ridiculous.
Keeping pace with the Champions are Boston Rock FC, who overcame their own bogey team, Elland Road Big Boys (for the last time!) by 4-1 thanks to Defoe, Lampard, Pires and Smith goals, and Thommo’s Titans, who continue their impressive start by beating bottom team Real Muppets 3-0, Bocanegra, Huckerby and England starlet Shaun Wright-Phillips scoring for the Titans.
Fred West, however, lost their 100% record this weekend. San Dimas picked themselves up after their 6-0 battering by Claymore last week to inflict Fred’s first defeat of the season, Yakubu scoring a hat-trick in the High School’s 4-0 win, This win earned Peej the POTW £100,000, so well done to Peej!
Another bogey was buried this weekend; Mega Buck Bandits finally won a Bevan Derby, strikes from Naybet and Hunt earning Dave a 2-1 victory over brother Ady’s Aardvark Abacus. After three games, the most successful team in WSFFL history thus find themselves in an unaccustomed 11th place. Ouchie.
Elsewhere, Trusted By Millions and Final Fantasy XI both pick up second wins of the season, beating Kylie Bumcheeks and Yorks Returning Glory respectively, and last season’s basement boys Nil Satis gain their first point of this season, a Jose Reyes goal earning a draw against the Groove Machine.
TRANSFER NEWS
Quite a lot of activity to report, and more to come!
Player From To Fee
Diego Forlan (A) Thommo’s Titans Villareal £1m
(undisclosed therefore refund)
Geoff Horsfield (A) Pool Thommo’s Titans £0.5m
John Otsemobor (D) YKY Boston Rock FC Pool £0.25m
Mark Yeates (A) Pool YKY Boston Rock FC £0.5m
Juninho (M) Aardvark Abacus Pool £1.75m
(since joined Celtic therefore not available under 48 hour rule)
Bradley Wright-Phillips (A) Pool Thommo’s Titans £0.5m
Matthew Sadler (D) Pool Thommo’s Titans £0.5m
Leandre Griffit (M) Pool Thommo’s Titans £0.5m
Danny Granville (D) Pool Final Fantasy XI £0.5m
Radhi Jaidi (D) Pool Claymore Athletic FC £0.5m
Noe Pamarot (D) 48 hour rule Claymore Athletic FC £3.6m
Gary Holt (M) Pool Claymore Athletic FC £0.5m
Darren Ambrose (M) Claymore Athletic FC Pool £0.25m
Jonathan Woodgate (D) Real Muppets Real Madrid £14m
Marcus Allback (A) Final Fantasy XI Hansa Rostock £0.5m
(undisclosed therefore refund)
Jonathan Spector (D) Pool Prettier Than You £0.5m
Lee Bowyer (M) YKY Boston Rock FC Claymore Athletic FC £6m
Stephen Carr (D) Claymore Athletic FC YKY Boston Rock FC £7m
(above deal = Bowyer plus £1m for Carr)
Gary Doherty (M) Pool Cooling Down Trusted By Millions £2.4m
Stephen Kelly (D) YKY Boston Rock FC Pool £0.25m
Morton Gamst Pedersen (M) Pool YKY Boston Rock FC £0.5m
Luis Garcia (M) 48 hour rule Trusted By Millions £9.1m
Xabi Alonso (M) 48 hour rule Aardvark Abacus £9m
Don’t forget that the players highlighted are now subject to the pool “cooling off” period, Any managers interested in buying them can bid until close of play Saturday 4 September 2004, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available. All bids to me please.
THE FF£100,000 QUESTION
Which Premiership team spelt their own name incorrectly on their own replica shirts this season?
Answers to me by close of play Saturday 4 September 2004. As usual, first correct one out of the metaphorical hat gets the dosh.
Mateja Kezman celebrated his goal for Partizan Belgrade against Red Star in a charged Belgrade derby by miming shooting the Red Star fans behind the goal with a machine gun. Nice to see Chelsea have bought another shy, retiring individual to replace the modest, self-effacing Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink.
Bit disappointing really; not only no correct guesses, but no guesses at all! So we have a rollover. Two hundred grand up for grabs this week!
SHORTS
· At the end of August there are 3 teams with 100% records. Two you’d kind of expect – Champions Claymore Athletic FC and You Know Your Boston Rock FC, one of the form teams of the second half of last season – however the other one is a bit of a surprise. So step forward Peter Thompson of Thommo’s Titans – your 100% early season form has earned you the August 2004 Manager of the Month award, and the £250,000 that goes with it. Well done Pete!
WSFFL RESULTS;
Week 3, W/E 28 August 2004
Kylie Bumcheeks 1-4 Final Fantasy XI
Beattie Andrew Johnson
Beattie (OG)
Campo
Bergkamp 27,880
Mega Buck Bandits 2-1 Aardvark Abacus
Naybet Hasselbaink
Hunt 34,510
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 1-1 22 Legged Groove Machine
Reyes Dickov 26,155
Prettier Than You 0-6 Claymore Athletic FC
(1) Mellberg
Pamarot
Henry
Osman 2
Berkovic 31,560
San Dimas High School 4-0 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Sinclair
Yakubu 3 40,864
Thommo’s Titans 3-0 Real Muppets
Huckerby
Bocanegra
Wright-Phillips 36,305
Trusted By Millions 3-1 York’s Returning Glory
Thatcher (1) O’Brien
Barry
Andrew Cole 35,290
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 4-1 Elland Road Big Boys
Lampard (2) Carlton Cole
Alan Smith
Defoe
Pires 43,593
Performance of the Week: San Dimas High School
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