IF IT AIN’T FIXED, DON’T BREAK IT
This Newsletter is brought to you thanks to the sterling efforts of the WSFFL unofficial Technical Genius, Mr. Ryan Moore. Ryan again came to the rescue of your stranded and flailing co-ordinator, after I’d downloaded an upgrade to my Yahoo service, which resulted in me being double-firewalled and therefore unable to access the internet! Once again, I’m utterly indebted to Ryan for giving up part of his Sunday afternoon, to ensure normal WSFFL service. Thanks mate!
Thanks also to Dave Bevan for his research yesterday regarding the missing (postponed? Who knows?) Blackburn-Watford game, and for letting you all know that this weekend’s fixtures were going ahead willy-nilly. Not only did I not have the internet service available to let you know, I was up in Albert Dock with Rach, visiting Evan, anyway! So thanks Dave for being the comms guy yesterday.
IT DON’T GIVE IN, IT WILL REPEAT, IT WILL REPEAT, IT WILL
The Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy Final, scheduled for Boxing Day, will be a repeat of last year’s final between Aardvark Abacus and Trusted By Millions. Trusted booked their place after beating league leaders Boston Rock FC 2-1 in this weekend’s replay. Goals from Barry and Gerrard looked to have secured Trusted’s passage, before a Defoe strike gave Beef a late scare. However, Trusted hung on, and now have the chance to avenge their final defeat last year at Ady’s hands. Seconds out, round two…
PLEASE BE MINE, SHARE MY LIFE, STAY WITH ME, BE MY WIFE
Eleven games gone, and it’s a husband and wife combo at the top of the WSFFL table. You Know Your Boston Rock FC consolidated their lead this weekend with a hard-fought 1-0 win over tricky opposition in Final Fantasy XI. Jermain Defoe was the match-winner for “The Sky Heroes”. Two points behind sit Prettier Than You; Rach backed West Ham big this weekend, and Anton Ferdinand and Jonathan Spector justified her faith, both scoring in a 2-0 win over York’s Returning Glory.
Up to 3rd go the Groove Machine; Sonko and Saha were on target in their 2-0 win over Mega Buck Bandits. They go above Aardvark Abacus, who needed a late Carvalho header to draw 2-2 with Nil Satis, Silva and Camara having previously put Paul’s team 2-1 up after Doyle’s opener. Ady drops to 4th place.
At the bottom, Nicolas Anelka finally gets off the mark this season, scoring twice in Eleven Imaginary Boys’ 4-0 win over the Dead Parrots. This result lifts Prov off the bottom, dumping York’s back into the basement, and also wins him the POTW half a million. Well done Prov! Thommo’s remain 14th after a 1-0 loss to Fred West LGXI, Dimitar Berbatov also getting off the mark this season, and moving Fred up to 5th in the process.
Elsewhere, San Dimas slip to 7th after drawing 2-2 with the Muppets, Sibierski getting a late equaliser for the High School; and Trusted keep up their recent form, moving up to 8th with a 3-1 win over Claymore, Malcolm Christie’s debut goal for Clive proving in vain.
WE DON’T COUNT OUR MONEY, WE ARE GIVING IT AWAY
A conversation with Ryan while he was fixing my PC, during which he lamented his ill-fortune in chucking away another wodge of cash on a crap striker (£19 million on Tevez this year, to follow his previous heavy and largely unrewarded investments in Morientes and Cisse) set me thinking. Generally, only one of this Summer’s ten most expensive imports into the Premiership (and into the WSFFL) have justified their WSFFL managers’ expenditure. You disagree? Well, let’s look at the evidence;
· Dimitar Berbatov (Fred West LGXI, £20 million) hasn’t lived up to his task as Fred’s replacement for Van Nistelrooy, saving his best Spurs form for Europe and only getting off the mark for Fred this weekend!
· Andriy Shevchenko (Trusted By Millions, £19 million) has been totally outshone by Drogba at Chelsea, and has racked up 2 goals only for Beef. A dismal return for someone of his reputation.
· Carlos Tevez (Real Muppets, £19 million) is even worse – failing to keep a first team place down, facing accusations of destabilising a good West Ham team, and drawing a blank for both Ryan and the Hammers. And all this before this weekend’s antics (see “Shorts”for more on that).
· Tomas Rosicky (YKY Boston Rock FC, £17 million) has also drawn a blank thus far. Robert Pires’ replacement for both Arsenal and “The Sky Heroes” has flattered to deceive, playing pretty stuff with no end product. Rather like Arsenal, in fact...
· Obafemi Martins (Aardvark Abacus, £16 million) has been overlooked in the crowded Aardvark frontline, so has yet to score for the Abacus.
· Michael Ballack (Final Fantasy XI, £15 million) has pretty much nailed down a first team place at Chelsea and “The Robins”, but Ceri will want more than his current 2 goal return for her outlay.
· Dirk Kuyt (Aardvark Abacus, £13 million) has been the one main success of the imports this season (typical – he’s Ady’s!). 7 goals for the Abacus thus far, justifying his place in both Ady’s and Liverpool’s crowded strikeforce.
· Gabrielle Paletta (Aardvark Abacus, £13 million) was supposed to be Liverpool’s new left-back this season, but has yet to start for either Liverpool or the Abacus.
· Nicolas Anelka (Eleven Imaginary Boys, £11 million), until this weekend’s brace, had been firing blanks for both Bolton and Prov. So much for his previous impressive Premiership track record…
· Khalid Boulahrouz (Mega Buck Bandits, £10 million) is in and out of Chelsea’s side, mainly on the bench, and only has one (cancelled-off) clean sheet to show for MC’s investment.
Your thoughts? Am I being too harsh on these players, is it still too early to judge, or have we really chucked our money away this Summer? And conversely, who’s been your best buy this season? Let me know!
TRANSFER NEWS
Clive also goes into expensive mistake rectification mode…
Player From To Fee
Malcolm Christie (A) Pool Claymore Athletic FC £500K
Albert Luque (A) Claymore Athletic FC Pool £3.075m
Don’t forget that the players highlighted are now subject to the pool “cooling off” period, Any managers interested in buying them can bid until close of play Saturday 2 December 2006, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available. All bids to me please.
THE FF£100,000 QUESTION
“It’s like wanting to marry Miss World and finding out she doesn’t want you”. An unusual quote from Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger earlier this season; about whom, and why?
Answers to me by close of play Saturday 2 December 2006. As usual, first correct one out of the metaphorical hat gets the dosh.
Premiership new boys Watford announced in early September that they had purchased the freehold of The Red Lion pub on Vicarage Road, opposite their Vicarage Road ground. A Watford spokesmen said, “we hope this decision will improve facilities for our fans” ‘Cos footy fans, they’re all piss-heads, like…
Correct guesses from Ryan and Peej this time. Real Muppets won the coin toss, so the hundred grand goes to Ryan. Well done!
SHORTS
· November Manager of the Month was a hard(ish) decision to make, as 3 teams navigated this month’s fixtures unbeaten. However, the performance of one team shone through, due to a higher wins-to-draws ratio, and the achievement of a Cup Final appearance. So sorry Big Man and Ryan, November 2006’s Manager of the Month is Andy Perfitt of Trusted By Millions. After a wholly unrepresentative start to the season, Beef hit some form this month in an unbeaten run, winning 3 of 4 league games, and overcoming Boston Rock (D’oh!) after a replay, to reach the PCMT Final again. Well done Beef, you’re £250,000 richer for your November efforts!
· Thanks to Peej for his compliments on my tribute to Ferenc Puskas last week. Peej wanted to offer this quote from the great man for consideration. “'I will write of my life as a footballer as if it were a love story, for who shall say it is not? It began with my great love of football and it will end the same”. If only some of our current Premiership footballers (arrogant Ashley, f’rinstance) approached the game, and life in general, in that same way…
· Bloody Typical Dept; Whilst watching the UEFA Cup game between Newcastle United and Celta Vigo on Five last week, I overheard an interesting fact concerning United (and Boston Rock) defender Steven Taylor. Namely, that he’d scored for England U-16, U-17 and U-21 teams, but hadn’t actually scored for his club! However, just as I was composing a Newsletter question in my head about that same factoid, Taylor popped up and headed in the Toon’s winner! So much for that idea!
· Also seen during the United-Celta game; a super-powered alien playing up front for Newcastle! Before you think I’ve totally cracked up, let me explain… the Newcastle players, rather stupidly, had their names in white lettering on the backs of their shirts, which of course are black and white stripes. So the only letter of Albert Luque’s surname visible on his shirt was the middle letter. Hence it looked like Q (of “Star Trek: The Next Generation” fame) was playing up front for United! Got it? No? Ok, I’ll shut up now…
· Following Carlos Tevez’ hissy fit following his substitution in this weekend’s West Ham-Sheffield United game, Rach and I heard a comment on Radio 5’s “606” which caused us both to laugh out loud. When asked by host Alan Green what he’d do with Tevez and fellow Argentinian misfit Javier Mascherano, a West Ham fan caller replied, deadpan, “I’d stick ‘em both on e-Bay”!!
WSFFL RESULTS;
Paul Cartmell Memorial Trophy Semi-Final Replay,
W/E 25 November 2006
Trusted By Millions 2-1 You Know Your Boston Rock FC
Barry (1) Defoe
Gerrard 22,673
Week 11, W/E 25 November 2006
Eleven Imaginary Boys 4-0 The Dead Parrots
Anelka 2 (1)
Lennon
Hyypia 24,409
Mega Buck Bandits 0-2 22 Legged Groove Machine
(1) Sonko
Saha 35,205
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum 2-2 Aardvark Abacus
Gilberto Silva (1) Doyle
Camara Carvalho 44,081
Prettier Than You 2-0 York’s Returning Glory
Anton Ferdinand
Spector 48,743
San Dimas High School 2-2 Real Muppets
Sibierski (1) Abdoulaye Faye
Reid Agger 26,435
Thommo’s Titans 0-1 Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
(1) Berbatov 33,162
Trusted By Millions 3-1 Claymore Athletic FC
Barry Christie
Carragher
Gerrard 34,454
You Know Your Boston Rock FC 1-0 Final Fantasy XI
Defoe (1) 75,948
Performance of the Week: Eleven Imaginary Boys
THE 2006/07 WSFFL LEAGUE TABLE
| ||||||||||
As at Sunday 26 November 2006
| ||||||||||
Team
|
P
|
W
|
D
|
L
|
F
|
A
|
Diff
|
Pts
| ||
1
|
You Know Your Boston Rock FC
|
11
|
7
|
3
|
1
|
28
|
15
|
13
|
24
| |
2
|
Prettier Than You
|
11
|
7
|
1
|
3
|
17
|
13
|
4
|
22
| |
3
|
22 Legged Groove Machine
|
11
|
6
|
3
|
2
|
18
|
11
|
7
|
21
| |
4
|
Aardvark Abacus
|
11
|
6
|
2
|
3
|
29
|
15
|
14
|
20
| |
5
|
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
|
11
|
6
|
1
|
4
|
15
|
16
|
-1
|
19
| |
6
|
Final Fantasy XI
|
11
|
5
|
2
|
4
|
17
|
12
|
5
|
17
| |
7
|
San Dimas High School
|
11
|
5
|
2
|
4
|
18
|
20
|
-2
|
17
| |
8
|
Trusted By Millions
|
11
|
4
|
4
|
3
|
16
|
12
|
4
|
16
| |
9
|
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
|
11
|
4
|
2
|
5
|
20
|
21
|
-1
|
14
| |
10
|
Mega Buck Bandits
|
11
|
4
|
2
|
5
|
15
|
17
|
-2
|
14
| |
11
|
Claymore Athletic FC
|
11
|
4
|
1
|
6
|
25
|
22
|
3
|
13
| |
12
|
Real Muppets
|
11
|
3
|
4
|
4
|
17
|
22
|
-5
|
13
| |
13
|
The Dead Parrots
|
11
|
3
|
1
|
7
|
13
|
25
|
-12
|
10
| |
14
|
Thommo's Titans
|
11
|
2
|
3
|
6
|
14
|
20
|
-6
|
9
| |
15
|
Eleven Imaginary Boys
|
11
|
2
|
3
|
6
|
10
|
17
|
-7
|
9
| |
16
|
York's Returning Glory
|
11
|
3
|
0
|
8
|
12
|
26
|
-14
|
9
| |
TOTAL
|
176
|
71
|
34
|
71
|
284
|
284
|
0
|
247
| ||
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