Friday, 14 February 2020

2005/2006 - Newsletter 24 (27 March 2006)

AND ALL THE TIME I FIND YOU CRAWLING ON ALL FOURS


In front of the highest ever WSFFL League gate of 69,070, the top two sides in the table slugged it out to an epic 4-4 draw this weekend. In a titanic seesaw struggle, league leaders You Know Your Boston Rock FC forged into an early lead through a stunning Harry Kewell strike, only for Jimmy Hasselbaink’s double to put Aardvark Abacus into a 2-1 lead. Further Boston Rock goals from Bent, Ferdinand and Gray looked to have settled matters for the “Sky Heroes”, only for Robbie bloody Keane to get a late late double, to snatch a draw for Ady. Whew!

So, the main beneficiaries of this stalemate were Trusted By Millions, who move into 2nd place and to within 5 points of Boston Rock, following a 3-2 win over the Dead Parrots. Following goals from Scott Parker – his first for the Parrots since his transfer from Boston Rock – and Marlon Harewood, Dean looked to be in command of this one. However, Trusted then squared the game through Okocha and Knight, and ultimately the Parrots were the architects of their own downfall, as Maik Taylor’s own goal gifted the points to Beef. Trusted now move 2 points clear of Aardvark, who they play in 2 weeks time. That’ll be a corker…

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI move back up to 4th place after hammering a slumping Nil Satis 6-1. Amongst the goals for Fred were his new basketball player Didier Drogba with a 2-pointer, and a solitary Ryan Giggs strike. How I wish soccernet.com had credited Giggs with both goals…San Dimas slip to 5th after being held 1-1 by the in-form Groove Machine, who consolidate their 8th place in the table.

At the bottom, Thommo’s Titans finally end their winless streak, winning in the league for the first time since Week 9, way back on 26 November 2005. Their 2-1 victory over York’s Returning Glory, courtesy of a Jay Bothroyd goal and a late winner from Curtis Davies, kept Pete’s team bottom, but lifted him level on points with his weekend opponents. The win also earned Thommo’s Titans the POTW £500,000. Well done Pete!

Elsewhere, the girly pillowfight saw Ceri’s Final Fantasy XI beating Rachel’s Prettier Than You 2-0 with Garcia and Bouma goals, to lift Ceri back up to 12th place, going above Rachel (and Paul Saleh) in the table. And in a good weekend for stalemates, Claymore and Eleven Imaginary Boys drew 2-2, and Real Muppets and Mega Buck Bandits drew 1-1, to complete a total of 4 draws from the 8 fixtures this weekend!


TRANSFER NEWS


Thommo fires his Cosmonaut back to Mother Russia, Sheriff loses patience (again) with an increasingly fragile Taffy, and Shaggy is no longer Imaginary! See details overleaf.

Player                                     From                                      To                               Fee


Darren Anderton (M)             Eleven Imaginary Boys          Released                      £0
Alexei Smertin (M)                Thommo’s Titans                    Dynamo Moscow       £1m
Mark Delaney (D)                 YKY Boston Rock FC            Pool                             £250K
Philip Ifil (D)                          Pool                             YKY Boston Rock FC            £500K

Don’t forget that the players highlighted are now subject to the pool “cooling off” period, Any managers interested in buying them can bid until close of play Saturday 1 April 2006, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available. All bids to me please.


THE FF£100,000 QUESTION

Here are a couple of questions to test your recent observational skills. The first;

Which Premiership player wore a blue mask for a couple of games in February this season?

Answers to me by close of play Saturday 1 April 2006. As usual, first correct one out of the metaphorical hat gets the dosh.

The first player to score against Chelsea in the Premiership this season was Aston Villa’s Luke Moore, during Villa’s 2-1 defeat at Stamford Bridge on 24 September. Incidentally, the £10,000, which Moore was awarded for his goal by a national newspaper, went to his old school, Hodge Hill in Bromford. Flippin’ teacher’s pet…

Correct replies from Ryan, Ceri, Clive and Beef. Irregular guesser Mr. Perfitt was first out of the hat, so the hundred grand goes to Trusted By Millions. Good week for him, then. Well done Beef, and thanks everyone else for your guesses.

Another wrong guess from Peej, who’s losing his all-knowing touch recently. He went for his new “default” answer of Jermain Defoe. I’ll give you a clue for next week Peej – Defoe did NOT wear the blue mask!!


SHORTS

·      March 2006 Manager of the Month time, following this weekend’s results, and this is one of those rare occasions where a manager actually retains the award. Yup, there were 2 managers who navigated through March with unbeaten records, but Mr. Timms beat Mr. Prov to the award, by virtue of his 3 wins and one draw record, as opposed to Jared’s record of 2 wins and 2 draws in the month. So, Rich Timms of the 22 Legged Groove Machine is the March 2006 Manager of the Month, pocketing £250,000 for his efforts. Well done Big Man!
·      Why is it, when strikers go on a surging run which ends in them blasting hopelessly wide or over from 25 yards, that the commentator or pundit always says apologetically, “well, he’s entitled to have a go from there”? Why are they entitled? Have they cut out a voucher from their breakfast cereal box which says, “this voucher entitles the bearer to have a crap shot from miles out, and not be booed or have the wee wee taken out of them”? Silly, isn’t it?
·      I always use the e-mail spellchecker when I send out e-mail to you lot, as I know what spelling pedants you all are. Oh wait, that’s me… Anyway, it always amuses me when it spellchecks WSFFL and offers the alternative of WAFFLE. Maybe it’s been reading some of my Newsletters…




WSFFL RESULTS;

Week 24, W/E 25 March 2006



Claymore Athletic FC                           2-2     Eleven Imaginary Boys

Jaidi                                                         (1)      Steven Reid
Rooney                                                               Bowyer OG                                     32,605

The Dead Parrots                                  2-3     Trusted By Millions

Parker                                                      (1)      Okocha
Harewood                                                          Maik Taylor OG
                                                                           Knight                                              29,593

Final Fantasy XI                                   2-0     Prettier Than You

Bouma                                                     (1)
Garcia                                                                                                                         27,019

Fred West Landscape Gardening XI  6-1     Nil Satis Nisi Optimum

Giggs                                                       (1)      Cahill
Drogba 2
Vidic
Silvestre
Del Horno                                                                                                                   44,923

Real Muppets                                        1-1     Mega Buck Bandits

Viduka                                                     (1)      McCulloch                                       36,152

22 Legged Groove Machine                 1-1     San Dimas High School

Giannakopoulos                                      (1)      Terry                                                42,321

Thommo’s Titans                                  2-1     York’s Returning Glory

Bothroyd                                                            De La Cruz
Curtis Davies                                                                                                              25,971

You Know Your Boston Rock FC       4-4     Aardvark Abacus

Kewell                                                     (2)      Hasselbaink 2
Darren Bent                                                       Robbie Keane 2
Rio Ferdinand
Michael Gray                                                                                                              69,070




Performance of the Week: Thommo’s Titans














THE WSFFL LEAGUE TABLE, Season 2005/06







As at 27 March 2006





















Team
P
W
D
L
F
A
Diff
Pts












1
You Know Your Boston Rock FC
24
16
3
5
71
32
39
51

2
Trusted By Millions
24
14
4
6
55
37
18
46

3
Aardvark Abacus
24
13
5
6
65
37
28
44

4
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
24
11
4
9
58
42
16
37

5
San Dimas High School
24
10
6
8
46
37
9
36

6
Eleven Imaginary Boys
24
10
5
9
34
40
-6
35

7
Real Muppets
24
10
4
10
46
45
1
34

8
22 Legged Groove Machine
24
10
4
10
30
50
-20
34

9
Claymore Athletic FC
24
8
9
7
46
38
8
33

10
Mega Buck Bandits
24
8
7
9
29
34
-5
31

11
The Dead Parrots
24
8
6
10
44
40
4
30

12
Final Fantasy XI
24
7
9
8
37
39
-2
30

13
Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
24
9
3
12
35
53
-18
30

14
Prettier Than You
24
8
5
11
34
44
-10
29

15
York's Returning Glory
24
3
8
13
23
49
-26
17

16
Thommo's Titans
24
5
2
17
17
53
-36
17
























TOTAL
384
150
84
150
670
670
0
534












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