MELE KALIKIMAKA!
Or Feliz Navi-nada, or indeed however you want to put it. It’s festive season so a very Happy Merry to all! I for one am determined to make it a better Yuletide than last year, by simply being conscious this year!
Anyway, there are of course WSFFL fixtures on Boxing Day and the weekend afterwards, so it’s not too much of a Fantasy League holiday. However, as I’ve got my son staying with me between Boxing Day and New Year’s Eve, I’m not going to have time to put out a full-blown newsletter, as I’m likely to be playing the villainous Sheriff Hook in his struggle against Evan Pan (don’t ask). However, I am intending to e-mail out the results over this period, particularly the one celebrating Boston Rock’s forthcoming victory in the PCMT final (sound of unhatched chickens being counted). Look out for the next newsletter in the New Year, after the FA Cup 1st Round games on 3 January. Talking of which…
SO PERFECTLY PAINTED, YET SO MANIPULATED
No, actually it was all done randomly! The first round draw for the 2003/2004 WSFFL FA Cup came out of the fabled yellow bag in the following order;
Aardvark Abacus v Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Claymore Athletic FC v You Know Your Boston Rock FC
York’s Returning Glory v Fred West Landscape Gardening XI
Trusted By Millions v Kylie Bumcheeks
Final Fantasy XI v Real Muppets
22 Legged Groove Machine v Thommo’s Titans
Prettier Than You v Mega Buck Bandits
Elland Road Big Boys v San Dimas High School
Ties to be played on the weekend of 3 January 2004.
Quite a tasty little draw, if I do say so myself. Rachel drew the home teams and I drew the aways, so if you don’t like it, you know who to blame! Pick of the round is arguably the clash between formerly in-form Trusted and champs Kylie, although I’m backing myself to pull off an upset against the mighty Claymore. Well, it could happen…
OFFENSE, DEFENSE, DEPENDING ON CRITICAL SENSES
The recategorisation review process has taken place, with all affected managers having been advised of the changed players in their squads. A full list is included in this newsletter, together with those pool players who are now subject to the pool “cooling down” rule after having been recatted advantageously (don’t get too excited – they’re all really shit, apart from Jo Tessem who’s only moderately shit). Please note that these changes will apply from 1 January 2004, therefore the first chance I’ll have to let Harry Kewell run riot in my midfield line-up will be the above FA Cup fixtures on 3 January. Watch out, Clive-lad…
Please also note that if any players are reported in to me on that date in their former positions, I’ll have no choice but to scratch those players from the starting line-up, so any manager doing so will find him/herself one (or however many) player down!
MAY WE ALWAYS BE SO HIGH
San Dimas High School go up to 4th and win the POTW £100,000 this weekend, following their 2-1 defeat of title contenders Claymore Athletic FC, as this weird Premiership season throws up another set of weird WSFFL results, with top teams slipping up again. In addition to Claymore’s defeat, recently resurgent Trusted By Millions lost 1-0 to Real Muppets, Mark Viduka’s goal the difference, and Champions Kylie Bumcheeks slip into mid-table after they lost the “Battle of the Richards” 2-1 to Mr. Timms’ Groove Machine (although only the women in his life call the Big Man “Richard”…)
Aardvark Abacus stay top of the table, despite only drawing 0-0 with a resolute Boston Rock FC. Final Fantasy XI climb back to 2nd after a Jason Dodd double sees off Nil Satis 3-2. Claymore and Trusted slip to 3rd and 5th, as the midfield pack close up on the leaders. Case in point is Fred West, who climb to 6th after a 1-0 win over seriously unlucky Prettier Than You, Fred’s one man team again winning thanks to a predictable goal from Ruud Van Nistelyawn. Rachel is therefore bottom for Christmas, 5 points adrift of Nil Satis, despite her 3 clean sheets being enough to have given her a win or draw against every other WSFFL team this weekend, bar of course Fred. Never mind Rach, at least you’re lucky in love…(!)
TRANSFER NEWS
Player From To Fee
Florent Laville (D) Trusted By Millions Pool £250,000
Linvoy Primus (D) Pool Trusted By Millions £500,000
Don’t forget that the players highlighted are subject to the pool “cooling off” period. Any managers interested in buying them can bid until 8 p.m. on Monday 29 December 2003, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available. All bids to me please. BTW As it’ll make diddly squat difference since no-one ever bids for players dumped into the pool, I’m thinking of shortening the pool “cooling off” period by a couple of days, until close of play on the Saturday after the newsletter publication, to line it up with the newsletter question reply time. Any objections? If no, one shouts, I’ll just do it.
THE FF£100,000 QUESTION
New Manchester United teen sensation Christiano Ronaldo is partly named after whom?
Guesses by close of play on Saturday 27 December 2003. First correct one out of the hat after that date gets the dosh!
The Premiership striker with his own record label is Everton and Claymore Athletic forward Kevin Campbell. His R&B label, 2 Wikid, has apparently just signed up Mark “Return of the Mack” Morrison on a £2.8million, 3 album deal, as well.
I received one correct guess only, from Ryan! So Real Muppets win the £100,000. Well done Ryan.
SHORTS
· Talking of our Muppet colleague, did anyone else notice that Wycombe’s 2 goalscorers in their 2-0 victory over Bournemouth this weekend were RYAN MOORE? The pair of Muppets on target were Wycombe’s own Keith Ryan, and youngster Luke Moore, younger brother of Stefan and on-loan from Aston Villa. Incidentally the Moore brothers, both promising youngsters with impressive youth goalscoring records, are both in the pool...
WSFFL RESULTS;
Week 13, W/E 20 December 2003
Aardvark Abacus 0-0 You Know Your Boston Rock FC
(2) 37,007
Claymore Athletic FC 1-2 San Dimas High School
Crespo (1) Terry
Samuel 47,126
Elland Road Big Boys 1-0 Mega Buck Bandits
Pahars (1) 18,244
Final Fantasy XI 3-2 Nil Satis Nisi Optimum
Dodd 2 Pires
Fortune O’Shea 35,910
Fred West Landscape Gardening XI 1-0 Prettier Than You
Van Nistelrooy (3) 26,508
Real Muppets 1-0 Trusted By Millions
Viduka 28,003
22 Legged Groove Machine 2-1 Kylie Bumcheeks
Howey OG (1) Beattie
Poyet 31,697
York’s Returning Glory 1-1 Thommo’s Titans
Radzinski (1) Les Ferdinand 20,722
Performance of the Week: San Dimas High School
ALL RECATEGORISED PLAYERS, W.E.F. 1 JANUARY 2004
Please note that as they have been recategorised into a more advantageous position, Martin Djetou, Sean Doherty, Andrejs Stolcers, Simon Johnson, Glenn Whelan, Yoann Folly and Jo Tessem are all subject to the pool “cooling off” period. Any managers interested in buying them can bid until 8 p.m. on Monday 29 December 2003, after which time they go into the pool proper and are readily available. All bids to me please.
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